18th Throw - [ voice ]

[shenevermisses]

I think the weirdest part about being here -- the part I'm never really going to get used to -- is having time.

[There's no Career act today, so Clove doesn't bother with the video. She doesn't want to have to smile when she feels... weird.

Not good, not bad. Just weird.

It's what happens, she's pretty sure, when she thinks too much.]

I didn't get that where I was from. In the Academy, the days were scheduled. Even when we didn't have classes -- like when we'd sometimes go home for the weekend -- I sort of just... kept that schedule. I didn't know what else to do. I even still sort of do.

But... here... we've got time.

Maybe a little, maybe a lot. But it's time.

[She's rambling, and she knows it, but the thought's been weighing on her for awhile. It's something that keeps getting stirred up every time she thinks it's gone.]

So. Let's say there's something you wanted to do where you came from. You know you can't go back; you'll never get to do it there.

Would you... do it here? Because you can and because you have the time to do it.

Comments

[Voice]

[origami_ninja]

What was it that you wanted to do, if you don't mind me asking?

[Voice]

[shenevermisses]

Something I used to talk about doing back home.

[Voice, filtered]

[origami_ninja]

[She won't probe too deeply, but she will try to get a little more specific. Since Clove is being guarded about it, she switches to a filter.]

As in trying a new hobby? Or something for a special occasion?

[Voice, filtered]

[shenevermisses]

A... a relationship. I guess that's the best way to put it.

[Voice, filtered]

[origami_ninja]

I think you should. Especially if you've never experienced one before.

[She knows exactly what 'can't go back' means, and doesn't flat out say it, but.]

If you have a second chance at life, you should make the most of it.

[Voice, filtered]

[shenevermisses]

Yeah. It's... just a pretty big change, so I'm... I want to be careful about it.

[Voice, filtered]

[origami_ninja]

Has the person you want to start a relationship with indicated any interest in starting one? Or treated you like a significant other without actually coming out and saying it?

[Voice, filtered]

[shenevermisses]

It's not... starting one... Not really.

[Voice, filtered]

[origami_ninja]

So, there already is one, unofficially?

[Voice, filtered]

[shenevermisses]

It's... pretty official. I think, at least.

[Voice, filtered]

[origami_ninja]

Then you're already trying a relationship right now, are you not? Or is it a matter of making the relationship public?

[Clove is a survivor, and Konan shares much some of the same paranoia. She can understand not wanting to make a significant other a potential target.]

[Voice, filtered]

[shenevermisses]

Most people know, I think. At least the ones who know me. It hasn't really been a secret here.

[Voice, filtered]

[origami_ninja]

[Konan's tone is pleasant enough as she asks her next question. She's sincerely curious what brought this on.]

If it's already happening, and the relationship isn't a secret, what made you ask about it? Curiosity if other people would make the same choice?

[Voice, filtered]

[shenevermisses]

Because I'm... trying to change it. The relationship. Or, at least, I think I'm going to.

[Voice, filtered]

[origami_ninja]

Change it in what way?

[Voice, filtered]

[shenevermisses]

Just... change it. It's stupid, really. Probably pretty pointless.

[Voice, filtered]

[origami_ninja]

To something more traditional? Or to make it become more serious? I don't think it's stupid, Clove, but I have no idea what it is that you want to change about it.