18th Throw - [ voice ]

[shenevermisses]

I think the weirdest part about being here -- the part I'm never really going to get used to -- is having time.

[There's no Career act today, so Clove doesn't bother with the video. She doesn't want to have to smile when she feels... weird.

Not good, not bad. Just weird.

It's what happens, she's pretty sure, when she thinks too much.]

I didn't get that where I was from. In the Academy, the days were scheduled. Even when we didn't have classes -- like when we'd sometimes go home for the weekend -- I sort of just... kept that schedule. I didn't know what else to do. I even still sort of do.

But... here... we've got time.

Maybe a little, maybe a lot. But it's time.

[She's rambling, and she knows it, but the thought's been weighing on her for awhile. It's something that keeps getting stirred up every time she thinks it's gone.]

So. Let's say there's something you wanted to do where you came from. You know you can't go back; you'll never get to do it there.

Would you... do it here? Because you can and because you have the time to do it.

Comments

[dangerouswind]

I would now. Time or not, you can't live with regret. [Which she is and she hates and she's learning. Hates that too.]

[shenevermisses]

[You can't live with regret.

That's part of Clove's thinking, too. Now, at least. That it's better to try because this could all be gone tomorrow.]

That's why I'm thinking about it. I don't want the chance to just... go away. Because it might. We don't know how long we're here, right?

[Voice]

[swordprincess]

[Karla's situation is exactly the opposite. She's had all the time in the world, and she was free to do whatever she wanted. But her mind had only been set on one goal. Now, she still has all the time in the world, but nothing that she really want to do.]

...I would do it here. Why would you not?

[Voice]

[shenevermisses]

Because it could all be gone tomorrow. And because I've never had the time to do what I wanted, so it's... weird.

[voice]

[noitatnacni]

Well, it depends on what it is. I mean, if you're talking about trying to take over the village or something harmful, then that's no good. But otherwise, why wouldn't you?

[voice]

[shenevermisses]

No, it's nothing like that. It's just... something for me. I mean... it could hurt. Sort of. But not... like that.

[Voice]

[origami_ninja]

I would. Though I've been keeping up with my training, I've also been sparing more time for my art than I have in years.

[Voice]

[shenevermisses]

Yeah. This place... just kind of lets you do that sort of thing.

voice;

[tomodachi]

Yeah, of course I would. [He's the kind that acts without thinking too hard about it, after all. However, there is one thing he probably can't do here, and it was something he couldn't really complete doing back there either.] You should just do whatever you want, and not letting stuff like time or whatever get in the way.

voice;

[shenevermisses]

I'm used to not having enough time. Before I came here, I couldn't just... think about if something was right for me or not.

[Voice]

[voidseeing]

Yeah, I would. You don't need any better reason than being able to and having the time. Life is too short to waste wondering whether or not you should give something a go.

[He's learning that for himself now. There are many things he'd just assumed he'd never be able to do, never be able to have, and then Elizabeth came along and suddenly there's a whole new world of possibilities open to him. It's both exciting and frightening, but it's also a chance he doesn't plan on wasting.]

[Voice]

[shenevermisses]

Seems to be the common opinion around here. [Which isn't her knocking it.]

I've had a lot of time to think about it. It's just... never the right time to give it a try, y'know? So I start to think maybe I shouldn't. Then this place does something to make me think I should.

[voice]

[stillplaying]

No.

[If it was anyone else, Katniss would have ignored the post. Wouldn't have bothered to listen to the ramble about time and wanting to do things. Why should she care? It'd only make her think of the stupid decisions she had made since coming here. One after another after another. And all because she thought it'd be okay - maybe even good - to do things she might never do back home.

But it was Clove who had posted this message. And as soon as she saw the name, she had pressed play. Even as the words made her frown, made her shift uncomfortably in her seat, she kept listening.

Until the very end.]

No. Whatever it is? You'll regret it. Everything here? You'll come to regret eventually.

[voice]

[shenevermisses]

Odd one out.

[And yet, it's an opinion Clove respects. Anyone else, she'd just shrug off. Engage a little but not really care. Katniss, though... Katniss is the one who understands her at least a little better than anyone else here.

Which is why she doesn't pull punches here.]

I've got nothing after Luceti. I know I might end up regretting it, but... this is my last chance.

voice;

[trashed]

It's kind of pointless, isn't it? Especially since we're going to end up leaving sooner or later.

voice;

[shenevermisses]

Well, when I leave here, I go back to being dead. So... Not like I really lose anything. Or gain anything.

action

[deadalready]

[Cato listens to her record her post, stays quiet for it before he leaves the room - goes into the kitchen and puts together some food.

This would be called a picnic but for them it's just food. No title for putting it all together in a backpack and slinging it over his shoulder. By the time he's done, he anticipates her conversations will be finished.

He walks over to Clove and nudged her on the shoulder before nodding to the door.]

Come on, we're going to the Battle Dome.

action

[shenevermisses]

The Battle Dome?

[Even as she asks the question, she's on her feet, shutting the journal and joining him near the door.

She isn't reluctant, not at all. Merely curious.]

voice;

[ex_tessen852]

I would do it here. Is there something holding you back?

voice;

[shenevermisses]

"Possibility of failing and feeling like a complete idiot" is on the list. Plus it'd be... a pretty big change. Sort of.

voice;

[curiositykills]

Sure, why not? This place has its own restrictions, but like you said, you've got the time, and you can. There's nothing stopping you.

Sometimes, you've gotta take risks. And better now than never, right?

voice;

[shenevermisses]

Better now than never.

Maybe.

I guess what's stopping me is... I've never really done anything like it. Not when it could actually happen. Or not happen. It's always just been... in my head. Never really had the chance to make it real.

[originaljackass]

Did it, done it. Turned into a big goddamn dragon for my trouble. Living out your dreams can be a little overrated, kiddo. But hell, you may as well do it anyway. We've got nothing but time.

[shenevermisses]

[Maybe it's because the comment genuinely caught her attention and wiped every other thought from her mind.

Maybe it's because this is a good chance to talk about something else -- she hadn't imagined how awkward it would feel to talk even in vague hypotheticals.]

A dragon?

voice

[not_a_troll]

Allow me to refer to your wood carvings, Clove. Combine that with the time you have. These two combined form a hobby.

[But the last question...]

Aye, I would do it here as well. Even though the hobbies I had back in Asgardia were rather non-existant. So it might not apply to me.

voice

[shenevermisses]

I'm not going to start carving again. [And it's not a hobby at all that she has in mind, but... she's not volunteering that information.]

voice;

[prims]

I would.

[ She'd never get the chance, otherwise. Like Clove. ]

...For however long it lasts, it's time. I don't think wasting it is a good thing.

voice;

[shenevermisses]

No matter the risk?

[She can't help but ask it. After all, this is Katniss's sister. The answer doesn't surprise her, not really.]